SO FRUSTRATED. (I'm not going to make cohesive thoughts here so if you can't follow I apologise.)

Firstly: Why can't they just get their instructions right. The lack of consistency keeps throwing everybody off. You can't tell us the deadline is on one day and then a few hours later tell us it's been shifted forward. It's fine if you do it once, but don't keep doing it??

Secondly: Hi, I'm Lindsay. Your group member. Remember me? Am I so insignificant that I'm not needed. Like wtf. I understand why you'd be annoyed with me, because I would be too (and tbh I am). But can you at least include me in your group discussions and decisions and not just tell me after you've discussed it amongst yourselves. Wtf.

Thirdly: What is up with all the persecution seriously. If you wanna hate on my faith then do it on your own time, stop spitting your venomous words at the class. For goodness sake no one wants to listen to your philosophical hour-long rants about how religion is cruel and the life is too complicated and we're too young to understand anything yet we need to have answers because we're already 19. OKAY I HAVE AN OPINION ALRIGHT WHY IS THAT WRONG. Oh right because I'm a christian, therefore my opinions are obviously tainted by religious biasness and I'm blinded by brainswashed faith OKAY SORRY FOR THAT.

(Wow print journ has trained me so well that I keep trying to make sure my paragraphs in this post flow well. Omg who cares if it flows it's a blog no one gives a shit.)

Aside from school of course there's every other aspect in my life, which I will not go into because I don't have time to worry about them coz everything is about school all day, everyday. It's so funny when people try to cheer me up by reminding me that the holidays are coming. Ha ha ha that makes no difference at all. It just means that the work I'd be doing in school I'm now doing at home/Starbucks/probably in still school.

This semester has probably been the lowest time of my life since the sec 3-sec 4 fiasco. All my electives are giving me grief. You'd think that studying things that you chose to do would make you like school but on the contrary, I'm so unhappy and frustrated almost everyday. I'm struggling to keep my head out of the water, let alone stay afloat.

I stayed up late doing Print Journ last night, so I only slept at 3:30am. I asked my friends to give me a wake up call at 7:30am.

Note: If you're expecting a wake up call, TURN YOUR RINGER ON. 

I woke up at 9:40am to 57 missed calls and 74 text messages. Quite a feat I would say.

God please help me I honestly don't know how I'm going to survive this semester.

"I don't hate school, I'm just really tired of it."
- Me two nights ago.

I take that back.

How Tolkien and Peter Jackson changed my life 11 years ago

So I was casually flipping through Tumblr on my phone when I came across this post:

The first girl is Katie Jackson, Peter Jackson's daughter. The second girl is Alexandra Austin, Sean Austin's daughter. Both appeared in the LOTR movies. Katie in Fellowship of the Ring, Alexandra in Return of the King.

These girls are around my age, both being 17. Then it occurred to me, that these pictures perfectly reflect my entire growth process since I was a child. 

11 years ago, I sat in the theatre with my mom watching the opening scenes of The Two Towers, my little heart filled with excitement and trepidation at the thought of an adventure much greater than my 8 year old self. I even remember the man in my row who got up and left midway through the movie and never came back (the only explanation for that I conclude, is that there was a medical emergency coz why else would you leave LOTR). When Return of the King premiered the following year, I was smitten. 

By the time I left primary school, I'd written my own LOTR book, learnt Elvish, studied the history of Middle Earth, memorised the calligraphy of the One Ring inscription, read the Fellowship of the Ring, J.R.R.Tolkien's biography, and a number of Tolkien's other works. Now, at 19 years of age, my love for Middle Earth has not been assuaged. No matter how many times I watch the movies (over 1000 times, I counted. Even broke a couple VCDs coz I watched them so much), I learn something new about it. Sometimes I even learn something new about myself. 

People ask why I love Lord of the Rings so much. There's no one answer to that. How do I explain the better portion of my life? My childhood, my entire teenage life? How do I tell them that this "movie", this "book", has helped shaped me into who I am? I can't. I can only say that I do, and hope that one of my babbling rants may cover just the top of that very titanic iceberg. 

I may grow out of it, I may not. Who knows? In 50 years when I look back I may laugh in embarrassment, or I may glow with pride at my unwavering loyalty. For now I will continue to wait in gargantuan anticipation for The Hobbit: Desolation of Smaug to premiere in Singapore, and attempt to bridle the unadulterated exhilaration that comes with seeing Tolkien's work on the big screen. 

And also Orlando Bloom as Legolas again. OMG.

2001

2013